What is YOUR views?

I have noticed lately, just because someone views something differently than you do, they'll actually fight over it. I don't understand how people can be so sat in their views, they would literally fight with someone that disagrees with them. For instants, witnesses to an auto accident, whether it be the drivers or by-standers. Literally fist fights have broken out. Each person sees the accident differently and are passionate that they were right. Let the police figure it out who is right and who is wrong. 

Now days it is politics. Sure not everyone will agree with politicians, no matter which party they are from, or the politician's laws or statements. So many topics are so controversial and many people have strong feelings and views about them.  It goes from politics, to religion, to the odd acting neighbors, to the flavor of ice cream. We ALL have different likes and dislikes, but none are worth arguing over, or fighting with someone who disagrees.

Another topic is  our Secretary of Health who is advocating no vaccinations and certain foods like non-pasteurized or foods that have preservatives added. Is he going to change the entire population that has eaten those foods since birth? No. I will admit,  Americans are heavier than we need to be, and we may not eat as many healthy foods as we should, but does any other country's population? I doubt it, so eat what you love and see your family doctor regularly. 

When I hear someone talk about a ridiculous thing like not getting their children vaccinated or something else stupid, I just roll my eyes, take a deep breath, and smile. Why should I get into a heated discussion which I will never change that person's mind or thinking. I may mumble under my breath, but never voice my criticism of their opinion. I trust science, years of history, and proofed facts, not insane fake information spread by people who have no idea what is right and would much rather believe lies.

But I will admit, there are somethings I WILL fight for. No necessarily physically fight for, but a calm adult type discussion. I will fight/discuss for our country and our democracy. And eventho the bible has been translated decades after the fact and by many people over the centuries, I will still defend it. And of course, I will fight for my family and my friends. I stand up for the right reasons and the right things. I am not perfect, but I DO know right from wrong.

I believe everyone should be more acceptance in other people's views and believes. Not judgmental or critical just because they don't believe the way you do. You don't have to go along with their believes, but just accept and agree to disagree, and walk away knowing you voiced your factual based opinion, without swing a fist or any harsh words. Take pride in that.

Nancy and I will be gone for a few weeks taking another international trip the the Serengeti region of Tanzania Africa. So until I get back, take care, and stay safe.

Camping (again) at 8,000 feet

 We all need to get away from time to time. And  we are the same. After buying a used travel trailer a few months ago, and not using it, it was time to pull it out and tryout that rig. What we found out was, yes it was nice to get away to somewhere fairly remote from people, and just join with mother nature and relax. 

Our Daughter and son-n-law have some property in Nutrioso (new-tree-o-so), a small development in northeastern Arizona close (12 miles) to the NM and AZ border. On top of a plateau covered with tall pines, a beautiful view on a good size lots. The only drawbacks is it takes 5 hours to get there and the weather got hotter. The breezy wind helped.

Some good friends joined us and in their 4X4, we went exploring the local dirt roads and back country. Not much blacktop under those tires. Time spent catching up about family and other friends, tales about each others' travels, sharing meals and drinks, and just day dreaming and relaxing. Nothing better than that.

But after a week without the internet, cell phones and TV, it was sort-of good to get back to reality of civilization life, unfortunately. And then I realized, " We don't do this enough." But after the last few months of surgery, chemo treatments, and doctor visits, you can understand why it was good to just get away. The clean air, the clambering of the wildlife around us, no traffic noise, and fresh mountain breezes, refreshes the soul and your mind. 

But then this next week, two doctor visits, with tests I am sure, and hopefully good news about getting rid of the 'IV port' planted in my chest, for good. That would mean I am in remission. At least for now.

Anyway, I am making this short so I can go visit with one of our self-adopted grandkids (she adopted us, but we would have adopted her too) in the hospital. Painful story.

So until the next edition, get out of town, go camping or take a nice long drive into the wilderness/countryside and breath deep with your eyes closed and clear your minds, and just relax under a big shady tree. Enjoy!

It is NOT over yet.

It all started last November, or maybe before that, I am not really sure. A simple procedure to make sure things were good and OK, that turned my thought process around forever. Both of my parents died from different forms of cancer, but I never thought I would have cancer too. Eventho my cancer was not as bad as many people thought, it was still cancer. And cancer is a thing, I believe, never really goes away. In my case,  it may be because of my own neglect that the doctor found cancer. Maybe if I had not been stubborn and had my normally scheduled colonoscopy, I may not have to go through a colon/bladder surgery and the following chemo treatments. But history can not be reversed or turned around. Maybe it was meant to be as a message to pay attention to your body and treat it well by get things checked when the doctors tell you. Who knows.

Now, after a few months going through the chemo infusions and the sleepless night in my recliner, I still feel I escaped the worse cancer had instore for me if I had not acted quickly, and did not get some great medical caregivers.

Thursday evening at a 'Boy's Night' gathering of retired firefighters, I sat next to a firefighter who went through pure hell with his cancer ordeal. His was related to the job and had to fight to get it recognized as a Workman's Comp case. Then, several surgeries, radiation and chemo treatments, more surgeries and excruciating pain, along with many months in the hospital. As the night ended and our discussions ended, I felt I had been blessed to not even come close to what he endured. As I have said many times, "There is always someone who has it worse than you". And he definitely did.

My side-effect inconveniences I experienced were exactly that, inconveniences. But as the title reads, 'It is NOT over yet'. I still have blood tests and Cat-Scans to go through to make sure nothing was missed and the cancer cells did not move somewhere else to do their dirty work. And if they did, well, we'll deal with that like I did before. There is not 'quitting' when dealing with cancer. You just find another way to defeat it, or slow it down, or remove it.

Until the tests are completed, I do what I always did, enjoy my family, travel and restore vintage cars. And even if the tests are not what I wanted to hear, I will continue to do what I like in life as long as possible.

Next week, Nancy and I along with our youngest grandson are going camping for a week in a cooler place in Arizona. We will be gone over the 4th of July for the tall pines of northeastern Arizona at nearly 8,000 feet, so I will not be posting a blog next Sunday, but relaxing and hanging out with friends and family.

So until the next blog, take care, stay safe and don't be crazy with fireworks. HAPPY 4th everyone! 

 

Losing someone you love and look-up to is tough.

 I suppose my childhood was not the TV version of the best, but it wasn't the worse either. We did not have a lot of money, or live in a house, mostly small unattractive apartments in some questionable neighborhoods but I did not care. I was with my loving parents. At least one was, my mother. My father had just gotten discharged from the Navy after WWll and was still young and wild, like most were then. He came to Cincinnati to stay with his older brother and look for a job. My mother was born in Alabama and moved to Cincinnati for work in a factory during the war. After they met, I was born the following year in 1946. I never asked them how they met, and when I was old enough to think about that, they were gone. They both came from the 'Great Generation' who never really discussed things like that.

At age 7, I was shipped off to my mother's parents farm in Alabama. For the next year I lived in an old farm house with no electric or indoor plumbing. I went to school there, and actually got the best grades ever, and I worked in the fields along side of my two uncles (mom's younger brothers) and grandparents. I picked cotton by hand, carried iced water to my grandfather as he plowed the fields behind a horse, took baths in a big wash tub, and fought with my uncles throwing mud hardened corn cobs at each other. Boy did they hurt. When they finally got electricity and water in doors, along with a telephone, I'd talk to my mother back in Cincinnati. My dad never called, or at least I don't remember him calling. He did came by and picked me up to go stay in a moldy old cabin next to a big dam. It was the worse time for a week. I got a bad sunburn cause he said I was too pale and needed to get a tan. No 'Coppertone' tan lotion back then.

When my mom finally came and got me, we lived in these small apartments for years. As a 5th grader, we moved 5 times and I was in 5 different schools in some rough neighborhoods where I learned to street fight to save my pale body and chubby appearance. My mother worked in a department store running elevators, eventually becoming the elevator girl for the owner of the store. She always worked and always was loving and we always had what we needed to survive, food, presentable clothing and a roof over our heads. But she needed a loving partner. To me, it seemed like she could not find the right guy. It wasn't until I was 12 years old she found a guy she would marry. Carl was his name and he become my step-father until he died. My father and I did finally reunited years later but it was a stand-offish manner. He never was the lovey-dovey type.  I wanted that relationship, but he just accepted it and went along.

Fast forward to many years later, my dad got skin cancer which was the cause of his death. We did talk in his last days and he told me he was sorry and loved me. First I remember him saying that. My mother passed in the same hospital building we both were born in. Her in 1924 and me in 1946. But I did not mean to bore you with my life story.

To my title point, when my dad passed, I was not at lose as I was when my mother died. Maybe because I felt my dad did not love me like my mother had. When I asked my dad to help with anything, it was with a long deep exhale and an reluctant "OK". My mother was always happy to help me. But she was never ready wanted to discuss my thoughts and dreams for my future. Maybe that was the way of that generation. Never really discuss or talk about personal thoughts and feelings with your kids. I missed not talking to them about my feelings on life in general. But now they are gone.  I have changed that in our family. We talk about ANYTHING the grand kids want to talk about. And we clear our schedule anytime they want help. 

It is hard to lose your parents because sometimes you feel like an orphan, but you're not. Your parents can not be replaced and part of them lives in you, like old photos, memories they cause you to remember, some things you do emulate them. But this is not just about parents, but anyone that means a lot to you. Siblings, friends, aunts and uncles, co-workers, anyone you cared for. You can never fill that void or their shoes. You have to remember the good times and times you spent with them. Cherish friends and relatives NOW before it is too late, even if you don't see eye-to-eye. And if you are lucky enough to still have your parents, ask them those hard questions now before...

Today is Father's Day and I miss both of my parents. They may not have been perfect parents but I am sure somewhere deep down they loved you as much as they could, and in their own way. Respect that and take comfort as you look through those old family photos and films. 

Take care and stay safe.

Good news

This last Wednesday, I received some good news from my Oncologist at the Infusion/Cancer Center. Week before last was, to me, was the week from HELL. I had no, NO energy, my mouth felt like a mouth full of needles, I lost most of the feeling in my fingers and toes, some of my hair started to fall out (which I expected that since I am going bald anyway), and I was becoming irritable and short tempered, which I never wanted to do. The Doctor said, "That is what I wanted to hear." I replied, "You did, and why." "That means you hit your max so now we can stop the Chemo."  I was surprised and glad. I said, "Why didn't you tell me that" "Because I knew you were a tough guy (me 'tough'?) and wanted to go until you could not stand any more, so when you said 'the week from Hell, I knew we hit your stop time."  

Now that does not mean I am in remission. That will still be testing for remains of the cancer. If there are none then I am good, but if there are, we continue with some more chemo.  And then there is a CT Scan in July too. I asked him about the infusion port removal. I guess we'll get that taken out after Nancy and I get back from Africa in late August. It does not bother me anyway.

Typically when you stop the treatments, it is semi-customary to go up to the nurse's station and ring a brass bell to tell the other patients and world you are done. But I did not do that. I just wanted to hugs the great nurses that was SO caring to me and the other patients that come in there. I could not do their job and watch some of the patient dwindle away. Especially the kids. I may have shed a tear or two as I exited the center. Let me admit it, Cancer really sucks and no damn fun, and I feel I had the light version. The nurses and the great staff made my time bearable sitting there for 3 hours while being infused with chemicals that basically kill your immune system and in return give you pain and and plenty of 'inconveniences'. God bless the more serious patients and their journey. And God bless the nurses that hold your hand and treat you like family while you endure it all. They are angels. Truly.

Now I can almost get back to a semi-normal life, as long as I get rid of the brain-fog and needles in my hands and mouth. I maybe able to feel a nut or bolt and get my taste back and feel the pleasure of cold ice cream and iced tea soon. We'll see.

Until then, you can have some as my alter ego and tell me how it was. So take it easy, stay safe and comment and follow me. 

Memorial Day - What are you planning?

 Recently, my daughter and I visited one of Phoenix's oldest cemetery, Greenwood. Five years ago, one of our self-adopted children passed and being from a very Chinese family, they adhere to traditional customs. When we first visited Greenwood a year after his passing, we were appalled there was no headstone or ever a marker for his grave. two years later I visited it again and still not markings. On this visit, we saw his family finally had a very nice headstone placed on his grave. My daughter and I broke down. She was a good friend of his since high school and Nancy and I love this goofy Chinese kid that no home life but enjoyed joining our family on any occasion we had.

Memorial Day is not only for remembering veterans, but anyone that means anything to you and that no longer with us. I am especially proud that our citizens rally around veterans, active and non-active, to pay tribute to their service and sacrifices they made to keep our country safe and free.

During the Viet Nam conflict when I entered the military, veterans were not appreciated. We were spit on and cussed at for servicing. That is why, unless I had to, I did not travel in uniform, and ever today don't wear any veteran attire like t-shirts or caps. My first airplane ride was to boot camp in Amarillo Texas.

Again during the Viet Nam era, killed soldiers' families were notified with just a telegram delivered by mail or a taxi, until a wife of an Army Colonel was so upset and rallied the families together to make it more personal and caring. Afterwards, families were notified by military personal, in uniform to not only notify the family, but to help comfort them from the shock of losing their relative. Organizations like the VFW , and the American Legion also try to comfort the families  during those times. It hasn't been until 9-11 that our country has paid so much attention to veterans, first responders for their service. We thank you for that. It has been a long time coming, because I am both, a vet and retired first responder. I sometime get embarrassed when someone says, "Thank you for your service.". I served because that is what you should do, not because of the attention. I am proud I was able and I believe most Vets and first responders would say the same. Anyway, every, EVERY male on my father's side served in the military from 1776 up to myself, and we are proud to have done that.

So Memorial Day and the weekend is not just about grilling some hot dogs and hamburgers, and going to a lake and boating, but to pay tribute to the one gone with a visit, maybe flowers or just to say their names in honor and gratitude.

Next time you see a uniformed service member or a police offer or a firefighter, or a nurse/doctor in scrubs, maybe pay for their lunch or coffee and just say, "Thank you." They will get it and appreciate you understanding what they are doing and continue doing for ALL of us. But also remember your relatives too. They ALL should never be forgotten by us. Take care and stay safe.

Do you have To-Do-List or a Bucket list?

 The answer is, Yes I do! I believe everyone does and probably half of them never get finished. I have some things for years and maybe decades. Eventho we built this house 27 years ago and Nancy and I designed it, we were here every step of the way during construction. I even helped the constructor as one of the carpenter laborers swing hammers and laid tile, plumbing, so we could save money. And I learned alot. But now after building it 27 years ago, we see some things differently and want to change things, which we can't do or don't want to do. So we are going to call in the professionals and let them do the heavy lifting. 

After Nancy came home from Cornwall England yesterday from her 60 mile in 5 days of hiking, she said she had plenty of time to think about things, and one thing she wanted to re-do our master bathroom. I said, "OK, and how much will that cost?" So I had to do some research and it isn't going to be cheap but affordable, because I AM NOT GOING TO MOVE ANYMORE! Anyway, more on that later when we have a idea of what we're going to do.

Back to Nancy's hiking trip. Her, and a dear friend, are planning to do overseas hiking trips in several countries. So far they have done Spain, Scotland and now Cornwall England, on the farthest southern coast of England. Next is another section of the Appalachian Trail in New York state. That will be number 6 out of 12 states. She typically does 1,000 miles hiking a year, which includes the shorter hikes (4 to 10 miles) around our house and the state. Crazy hiker. Meanwhile I just work in my shop on cars. Crazy car builder. 

So we have a "To-do list" for the house and camping and now (which we have had for a while) a "Bucket list" for countries we have not been to. Not to brag, but we have hit all but one continent accept Australia and or New Zealand. Those are on the list now. Covid stopped our New Zealand trip but I think that will be within the next year. Tanzania Africa is coming in August, with quick layovers in Kenya and Qatar. Another LONG flight. "Sigh" But we love Africa.

Not that I think of myself as a famous person in any means, but do want to finish a book I started many years ago about a (not another fire department book) green eyed boy being raised my a divorced single mother in Cincinnati in the 50s and 60s. Guess who? And some of the plans he had about life and moved around so much and finally found his focus in life. AND, fell on his face MANY, MANY times before he did. 

I am going to make this short today. Hope you comment about your 'To-Dos' or trips. I'd love to hear about them and how you all are doing in this mixed up world. But here are some of the photos Nancy sent me from the UK on her hike last week. Take care and stay safe.

Yep, BIG boulders to climb over. And wild horses too.

Beautiful sea shores and more boulders.

And two lovely, hearty ladies living their dreams. Proud of them both, but mostly Nancy.

Day 3.