I believe the worst of Covid is past, I hope. But now, instead of a Pandemic we have an Epidemic. Yes, teen suicides is rising rapidly, and as parents we can slow if not stop it.
Children struggle with SO MANY things that I did not have growing up. Many kids deal with depression I had not realized until a family close to me announced their child had taken their life. The parents saw the signs but thought it was just that adolescent stage. They did not comprehend those signs and could not or would deal with it. Not eating, staying in the room, on their phone all the time, not talking, not sharing in family activities and just being unsociable. Some is peer pressure, demanding parents to be like them, demands to do things better in school or sports.
Nearly 1 in 5 people born after 1997 identify as LGBTQ and refer to themselves as 'She, he or him'. Sexual identity, loneliness, climate change, being bullied, deep political and cultural discord is an awful lot for a 14 year old the deal with. Then you throw in being told the stay home for school for two years during Covid, and feeling they can not talk to their parents about their feelings. That is a lot.
Teens and pre-teens want to be involved, loved and be able the talk about their feeling openly without pressure and told the 'pick yourself up and be strong'. It would probably be a rude awakening to be that fly on the wall in their bedroom as they lay on their bed talking to a friend on their cell phone about how they can't talk to their parents about things. "They would tell me, just be a man/woman and deal with it". I know, I have been there with my kids and the angry discussions that never got anything settled except more angry. But then I realized what it was like in their shoes when I was a kid. No comparison. Our kids ARE NOT US! It is a whole different world today and all we can do is support the kids, not be judgemental, give advice and suggestions not alway demands, educate them with facts and not bearishing them over the head with, "When I was your age, we did it this way." And video games don't really help with shooting games and crashing cars.
Your childhood can not be re-lived through you children. They must find their own way throughout each step and turn of life. Growing up is not easy with trap doors hidden everywhere. Your job is the guide, support, encourage, teach them about good and bad, and ALWAYS have an open mind and ear to listen when they need someone, other that that so-called friend of theirs who thinks they know all the answers, when sometimes we don't either.
Children are precious and vulnerable. I wish sometimes there was a book on how to be the perfect parent/grandparent. Many have tired, but fell short. I still learn from our grandkids. I have always told them, "You can call or come over ANYTIME to talk. What you tell me, will never go any farther ... unless there is a lawsuit coming." They always laugh about that. I was never the perfect parent, if fact, I may have gotten a 'D' if I was graded. An open ear, support and trying to understand their point of view was hard sometimes, but I tried and they knew that.
The multiple mass shooting we have seen and witnessed by teens and pre-teens is evidence of a serious mental problem this country needs to address NOW! PLEASE, as mothers, fathers, aunts, uncles, grandparents, reach out to your kids and let them know you are there for them and just listen to what they say. It will be appreciated and hopefully ease some of their anxiety and hopelessness they may have. We all need to be there for them. Related or not. They are our future. Take care and stay safe.
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